More Than D*ck & Fart Jokes

(...Or More D*ck & Fart Jokes...just longer)

I've spent the last 20 years (20 years!) on various social media platforms making d*ck and fart jokes, posting photos of my life, and sharing memes and anecdotes about everything from politics to the picayune.

For a few months, I've been toying with writing more long-form and more in-depth. But a little voice (that sounded a lot like my older brother’s coincidentally) told me not to because the world really doesn’t need another person sharing every dumb little thought adding to the never-ending hellscape of opinions…do they?

As the months passed, I brushed off the desire to write; furthermore, I questioned the narcissism and self-importance that must have led me to share so much online over so many years. What fundamental flaw do I have that makes me want to share my life and opinions with my circle of friends, family, and colleagues?

Let me add some context: I’m an elder millennial so social media came to be in my adulthood. And I was an early adopter of each platform respectively (Myspace, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat, and Tiktok). I’ve always enjoyed social media and have had a net positive experience over the past 20 years…probably because I’ve (mostly) always avoided the bad parts.

I stick to three rules:

1. Unfollow or Unfriend anyone who doesn’t bring you joy

2. Never read the comment section

3. Do not argue with hoes (strangers) on the internet*

With those rules in place, I’ve been able to watch people’s children grow up from afar and stay updated on my friends and former colleagues all over the world that I otherwise would have lost contact with. I’ve shared countless laughs and thoughtful conversations about politics and culture (in good faith, of course). And I’ve shared my struggles, my triumphs, my work, and my life. And I thoroughly enjoyed all of it…because that’s who I am.

*if this were a quirky coming-of-age movie this is where you would see a cartoon light bulb appear over my head*

That’s who I am at my core. I’m a sharer; I’ve always dreaded small talk; I’ve always built connections through vulnerability; I’ve always been an open book; I have a big laugh; I have bumper stickers; I’ve always let my “freak flag” fly. Always.

I so realized…nobody needs to hear my voice- I need my voice.

But social media was not the place to share it; at least not in long form. A friend recently posted on social media “This platform does not deserve your vulnerability”; and God was she right. So here I am on a platform more deserving of my vulnerability and voice with people who actively seek it out (or maybe no one reads and who cares because this is for me).

Substack is prompting me to tell you how often I will post, and on what topics, and what you’ll get out of it because “Readers love clarity.” They suggested making a bulleted list for you so here goes:

• I have

• no idea

• what I’m doing

But here are a few things that I enjoy talking and writing about and maybe they appeal to you:

• feminism

• parenting (with feminism!)

• faith and religion

• comedy & media

• U.S. culture/politics/hellscape

• the youths

• injustice

Fun, right? But hey, I promise to throw some d*ck and fart jokes in there for ya. And possibly a meme or two as a little treat.

*credit where credit is due to comedian and friend De De T for coining the phrase and teaching me to never argue with hoes on the internet. Go see a show or check out her album We’re All Gonna Die (Practical Niihilism for the Millenial Black Woman)

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